Talented Family with Beautiful Hearts

 

In case you did not already know, I have some extremely talented family who have amazing hearts.

 

Mowgli

Mowgli came to stay for a few days while his moms went back to mainland. We had a blast playing at the beach and walking around the neighborhood. I love it when he comes to hangout!

Happy Thanksgiving

A great evening of delicious food and conversation with friends!

Buddy Check 22

The twenty-second of the month is here. It is a day every month that reminds me that I am not alone, there are others that have struggled and continue to. As a friendly ghost once reached out to buddy check me three years ago, today is a day that I chose to ensure someone I care about will be here tomorrow.

Every day, an average of twenty-two veterans and active duty service members take their own lives.

That is twenty-two too many.

While we should do this daily, I encourage you on the twenty-second of every month to call and check your battle buddy. Military or not, we deserve to see each other tomorrow.

 

 

When I came home last time, I returned to a work environment that did not mentally or academically challenge me. I quickly became bored in many aspects of my life that led to additional problems making life increasingly difficult. In casual conversation, my Company Commander mentioned that she was in grad school part-time. As work had become a place of boredom and frustration, I decided to give grad school a try.

I have taken my time with the program I chose. I probably could be done with it by now had I not taken intermittent time off. But I am glad I did. The course work itself is not difficult, but the idea of completing this degree simply because "I want to" has made this worth it. 

 

Having deadlines that have nothing to do with my work environment helped me maintain a form of structure and order in my life. Something I desperately needed. While at times grad school has been tedious, it has been one of the best decisions I have made. Graduate school has been a form of my own personal buddy check.

 

 

#twloha

#buddycheck22

 

 

Crisis Text Line 741-741

 - a safe place to talk via text with a counselor when you can't or are afraid to use your voice



Sunrise Atop Koko Head

 

Makapu'u Light House

 With my favorite four-legged girl on island.

 And Skeletor flew by.

The Eleventh

In the eleventh minute of the eleventh hour on the eleventh day of the eleventh month, I thank you for the example you have set for me to follow.

Long Week

Mom and Dad were here!

Spent most of the time my parents were here at work in the hospital.

New goal in life.

Enjoyed hiking with Skeletor.

 

Following the Leader, the Leader, the Leader

Sloshing through the mud at the ruins of the summer palace.

Talking is Difficult

Joking is easy. Talking is difficult. This is nothing new for me, but the struggle remains. To share the broken, hurt pieces of me feels as though someone could see right through to the core of my vulnerabilities. The feeling of terror at the thought of someone learning of my vulnerabilities and once again using them against me has fortified my walls. Without these walls, the fear of feeling naked and exposed or unsafe may be felt again. Feelings that do not need to be re-experienced.

People say they are willing to listen. It is a dream to someday trust myself enough to be able to believe them. Please understand that there may not be requests for help as the irrational thought of inconveniencing someone else is often too much to overcome. Be patient, but please do not fail the buddy check of those you care about.

 

No, this is not a cry for help.