rainBeau and Lucy

I have finally reached the end of my night shift rotation. It has been a long 3 months. I do not know how my teammates do this all the time. Today I got off work at 0700 and will be heading straight to bed with hopes of sleeping a good chunk of the next 24 hours as I start day shift tomorrow. Yup, a quick turn around.

Thankfully rainBeau gets plenty of play time with his girlfriend Lucy on random days to get his energy out when we don't go on long walks or runs.

5-7-5

For those that know me, I rarely honestly talk about how I am feeling. It is often conversations after dark when the world has slowed that I feel safer to talk. Even that still scares me.

I keep my sadness to myself as I fear you taking on some of my emotions. I fear you will misunderstand how I feel or not be able to sympathize that I hurt for reasons that make no sense to you. These are my issues, not yours.

Irrational as that may be, it is what is in my head.

 

 

I recently got a book of haikus on love. To help me, I decided to write my own about whatever, but hopefully about what I am experiencing or feeling. They may not make sense to you, some may even seem scary to read. But it is my hope that I start to share through a simple 5-7-5.

Even One Life is Too Many

Before you deprive the rest of us of your smile, your voice, your love, your tomorrow

Please, please, please reach out for help. A battle buddy is not a short term relationship.

 

 

This is a lesson that I have had to learn. I have had people reach out to check me and I have learned (still bad at this) to reach out when I need to be checked. A person, a life, is not a burden.

 

Suicide is a real thing both in the military and on the outside. For more reading click here and here.

 

Even one life is too many to lose.

 

While we should do this daily, I encourage you on the 22nd of every month to call and check your battle buddy. Military or not, we deserve to see each other tomorrow.

 

 

 #twloha

Crisis Text Line 741-741

 - a safe place to talk via text with a counselor when you can't or are afraid to use your voice

Farm

Just Horsing Around

Playing in the Snow with Friends

The weekend may have started with some excitement (friend's RV engine caught fire just a few miles from destination), but was filled with fun and laughter. Brittany had recently got out of the Army and moved to Seattle area for work. Michelle and her family were able to take an extended weekend to head to the snow.

The entire week in WA was fantastic. Good food, great friends, and as always much needed conversations.

 

Brittany learning to snowboard.

 

Self-portrait with Mt Rainer.

 

Supergirl cape.

 

This kiddo rocks!

 

 

 

It Is Just Pretty

While I may not be the best at always appreciating where I live, today was a day that I did. Enjoyed the morning and evening on different sides of the island watching the start and end of the day.