My professional life is spent helping people get back to their
best or to pass with respect. It is a strange world. One that should affect me
emotionally. I get to be present when patients are declared cancer free or told
that a surgery saved their loved one’s life. I am also present when someone is told they have a limited amount of time left or when someone
takes their last breath. There have been times in which I am the only one in
the room with the patient as they pass while we hold hands.
Emotions escape me. I do not know if this is a safety
mechanism or a part of my depression, but I simply do not feel.
As I read more about depression both from the psychology
world and people diagnosed with it, I am baffled by the lack of ability to
experience emotion.
Is the lack of emotion part of why people choose to take
their life? Are they so numb to everything that that leads to a pain in the
soul that can only be understood by those who have been there? Are they so numb
that for the brief moment before they kill themselves, they actually feel?
How do we know to check in on our friends, family, or
strangers? Do we wait until we see warning signs? Or do we act daily to ensure
that we do not lose another person who deserves to have a future?
Even one life is too
many to lose.
While we should do this daily, I encourage you on the 22nd
of every month to call and check your battle buddy. Military or not, we deserve
to see each other tomorrow.
#twloha
Crisis Text Line
741-741
- a safe place to
talk via text with a counselor when you can't or are afraid to use your voice
